Becoming Domestic

I do know that we are extraordinarily lucky living where we do and living the way we do. We have three beautiful, healthy little kids, great friends and family etc etc etc but very occasionally, when I’m tired, or have too many things going on at once and feel under it I need a reminder about how fortunate we are.

This week I was getting irritated with myself for not having a house which was nice and tidy all the time (mainly because the boiler needs fixing and all the shelves with all the stuff on are taken down in anticipation of the repair man coming on the day he said he would). I also always feel a little inadequate when I visit a friend’s house for the first time and see how neatly they are able to keep their house compared to the way ours always seems to look despite our best efforts. When we went to a bbq at another family house this weekend I asked the hostess how she managed to keep such a lovely home and wrote her answers down. This was great for me as its something that is rarely discussed between us girls and somehow I managed to miss out on how to keep house as I grew up. She made it sound so easy and stressed that she wasn’t mad on housework but does love the results. Here are the weekly routines she uses.

Mon: Bathrooms

Tues: Dusting, mirrors, windows, clean kitchen floors, online shopping delivery put away

Wed: Beds and a ‘zone’ (ie. one main area like the lounge, the main bedroom, kids bedroom)

Thurs: Hoover rooms and an extra good hoover in the zone

Fri: Bleach kitchen surfaces and do the floor

Sat: Order food online

Sun: Clean fish tank

I do remind myself
(a) that I don’t live in a modern house and that in itself gives our house a more shabby country chic look along with the fact that a large percentage of the things we own are from second hand sources.
(b) I have a newish baby, a part time role with Bealers’ firm, and two messy five year olds who are given more stuff (toys & clothes) than we can actually cope with by their four loving sets of grandparents so have not enough time and too much stuff to make the house the minimalist zen-like environment I dream of.
(c) by following a few simple housework rules it is super-easy to go from a house which feels horribly messy (especially after the weekend with grass and mud being trampled into one which feels orderly and well tended with not much effort.
(d) There is probably a good case for ceasng to hang out with friends who have super huge, gorgeous houses with small armies of cleaning staff as I tend to look at our own home in a poor light after visiting them but I can’t as they’re my chums. I’ll just have to re-read this post and resist any kind of urge to feel envy for others.

As the Massive Attack lyric goes

‘Though you may not drive a great big cadillac
Gangster whitewalls tv antenna in the back
You may not have a car at all
But just remember brothers and sisters
You can still stand tall
Just be thankful for what you’ve got’

Two posts from fellow simple-life, green and frugal bloggers were really inspiring to me this week. The lovely pictures on Ted & Agnes blog of a beautiful family home with gorgeous home made and second hand treasures made me open my eyes to some areas of our home (obviously not the piles of laundry waiting to be put away, or the kids playroom with the toys all out on the floor) and how nice some of the things we have picked up from Freecycle or second hand shops over the years are. Here are the pictures to show myself if ever I forget what a nice place it is:

Slightly broken mirror from my Grandfather - clearly says ‘Property of Buckingham Palace’ on the back, a picture of us moments after our marriage vows were exchanged in an East End pub with the registrars who did the deed.

More wedding paraphenalia - a remnant of the beautiful poem our friend Jane painted for us mural-style for the wedding (I left the comics in the picture as it reminds me that my son sits there to read)

The view from my bed as I feed my baby several times a day. How can I ever find anything to moan about with this outside the curtains?

My kids’ curtains made from popular Ikea fabric but brings an advance tear to my eye thinking of the days when they are no longer children and how this pattern will invoke memories of all the years of goodnight lullabies and sleepy chats. They have a nice view too.

Patchwork quilt from local charity shop, dressing table from car boot sale, hand painted name tags and better than all of this - the twins have learned to make their beds every morning!

The view from the baby’s nappy change unit.

Our veg garden - all Bealers own work this year as I’ve opted out completely

The other post which made me really stop beating myself up over the state of our house was from Finding Simplicity which lists out many of my favourite things to feel happy about as hers too.

I came up with a few things of my own to realise once in a while to:

1. The House-Spotless and Hotel-Like Auditors are **not** due to arrive tomorrow (or the day after, or ever actually).
2. The house I live in will be very clean and very quiet for all the many many years that my children are likely to be grown ups. My Gran is now 94, her son - my father is in his sixties. She has had five decades of not picking up his things, not treading on small toys, not asking him to be quiet and not washing up his porridge bowl . Presumably the cuddles dried up a lonnnng time ago too.
3. Finding the time to enjoy the smaller things makes a huge difference. Watching a blackbird feed a cherry to its young, the mother rabbit with quadruplet babies bounce around in the evening sun, my five year old daughter gently explore the contents of my sewing basket while I mend her bunny, my small baby learning to laugh, to feed, to use her hands, the warmth of sun on skin, a beautiful sunset, being able to phone my mum and dad for a chat and for advice, flowers. These are all things I enjoy. I am hugely rich.

Posted on July 2nd, 2008 under Bits and Bobs, Home Management, Vintage Country Shabby Chic • RSS 2.0 feed • Leave a response, or trackback